So THIS was a part of the plan? (Reflections from Gen. 13)

We need to continually be reminded of the details of God's calling that are unveiled over time.  It is a curious thing though how we assume our story should be so different from that of those who have gone before us.  That is, we assume the unveiling of God' plan, specific to our calling, needs to come all at once, when we could never find or show He has ever done that with anyone before us. 

Abram's story was hardly an exception to this principle.  As God called him away from family and lands, He made a promise (12:2-3) to make of Abram a great nation, great name, blessing, cursing on those who curse.  All this hinges on Abram having offspring (12:7).  And of course the land would be his too.  But in chapter 13, amidst the strife between Abram and Lot's men, the Lord's plan isn't apparent until after Abram and Lot's conflict is resolved.  And if we didn't read further we may get the sense that God has somehow let Abram down, that His promise will never come to pass.  But actually this change of scenery, this abrupt change of company for Abram only truly broadened his understanding of the land promised to him.  Too, the scope of his offspring was clarified in the phrase, "as the dust of the earth."  Point is, God will reveal things over time and no changes we face should reflect a change to God, or to His plan.  His all-wise, purposes, the details He at times withholds and eventually clarifies, is completely at His jurisdiction, until He determines it necessary.  

And so let not the season of change in our lives give us the impression that God has changed, or changed His plan.  Let them not create in us a doubt or distrust in Him.  Indeed, even in the confusion and chaos we experience that disorients us from what we knew, God is at work.  And in that process He will only refine us, clarify His plan and direction, even as He reveals increasing measures of Himself.  All for our joy in His glory. 

But Grace

The faith inside me

is weak at best

no part of me could have guessed

that it would go

this way

and yet here i am

again today.

“cease” the reason within me proclaims

all plans, all hopes, at best a calamity

it seems all in vain.

little support

little reliable

how can this

be any bit viable?

sunken

sullen

broken

all’s been spoken

even as it seems

the dreams

of what i thought

through all battles fought

and now standing here

in this place

i have nothing left

upon which to stand

but...

(additional pause)

Grace...

Grace?

you know, the face

of Jesus

He frees us

to live for something greater

a purpose

this meal to eat

and to the world cater

namely HIM

the brilliance of His glory

for when He is clearly seen

the beams

of radiance

cast shadows

to darken and make pale

revealing the stale

taste of all this life

and so through my strife

if indeed i could call it such

because i am learning there is much

more greatness to this Christ

and the price

we pay

to follow Him

again this day

is nothing

for what is gained

outweighs

all the struggles

these that befuddle

these that confuse

seem to abuse

break

shake

tear

wear

and cut from the inside out

leaves space for Him

as my soul continues to shout

for HIM to fill in the many cracks

of who i am

and so this day

i embrace the attack

upon me

for through this

He makes me free

An Original Planter - Abram

Reflecting on the calling of Abram (and so shall I call him until Scripture advises me to change his name), I marvel at how many parallels lie between he and a church planter.  He was the original "parachute planter" who wasn't just about to see God establish a local body, but a nation, and ultimately His own kingdom.  This is a massive work of God, no less a massive change of scenery for Abram to partake in this. 

As we open up Genesis 11, we begin to anticipate something being set up by the author.  After giving more genealogical lines of some more rather "obscure" characters, the list comes to an end with Terah, but not before it is developed a bit.  Further, we get a preview to Abram being "called out" as Terah takes his family and leaves for the land of Canaan.  It wasn't until they arrived in Haran that he was apparently content, for whatever reason, to stop there and settle there.  While unspoken it is fair to conclude God was at work in preparing Abram for this eventual move.  His heart and mind had to be anticipating it ever since the day he left Ur to go with Terah and the family, even to go to Canaan.  I believe we see the subtle unveiling of God's sovereignty in all this.  Nothing mentioned in this text of Terah's relationship with God.  It doesn't indicate anywhere that God spoke to him to call him to Canaan.  But we must ask - Where did this desire come from?  Something initiated it, or better said, Someone initiated this.  Of course the ensuing chapter give us clear indication that this was God's design. 

We'd do well to look at the patterns in our lives.  What has happened to move us, create desire in us, cause us to take some risk?  God has used so many things, at so many times, to prepare us, create a longing in us, for some drastic things.  And even though we may not be able to point to conclusive evidence that convinces everyone else this was "God's doing," stories like Abram's help us to see deeper into just how it is that God must be actively involved in all the many details even to prepare us for what He desires.   And so as we look at Abram, and find God in the story, we find our own lives in this story and find comfort knowing what God undertook, He fulfilled.  So be encouraged.

Helpless

My role as father has been far more delightful than anything I ever imagined.  I only ever before considered the cries of kids to be annoying.  Part of me feared that I might get too overwhelmed by my own kids during such episodes that if you really wanted to know, I felt kids may not be in the mix for me.  But something is obvious now that my kids are crying: I delight in it.  I delight to be able to respond, answer, and comfort them in their unrest.  There is something so fulfilling in it. 

It all helps me consider God, the perfect Father.  I, His unruly child, mistake-making, fear-filled, and restless.  And as I endeavor to do even as He asks me to do, I get overwhelmed.  There is no distinctive manual on these matters when it comes to the specifics of our personal situation(s).  

Standing on the verge of planting a church, there are thoughts and ideas that bombard my mind.  There is planning and preparation that takes place.  There is an overwhelming burden that finds its home and consumes space on the heart and mind, and even invades the physical well-being at times.  And it is the result of the realization of the enormity of the task at hand and the inferiority of all that I am.  There is no end to this reality.  Day after day I find myself confessing my inabilities, my struggles, my doubts, my worries.  So much like my own kids, I make known just how inadequate I am for what ails me.  Oh and how I am coming to see God's great delight to meet me.  It is not that He is asking me to make no efforts to plant a church.  Same way as I want to see my kids try new things, stretch themselves to grow in every aspect.  And so God allows my struggle to continue.  But through it all He delights that I realize my need for Him and His grace.  

And so in all my questions, concerns, complaints, pains, worries, woes...I know God is honored, because my heart's cry comes before Him, even as I confess His sufficiency to do all I need, because of who He is. 

Come and See What God Has Done

"Come and see what God has done; He is awesome in His deeds toward the children of man" (Ps. 66:5). 

Standing before the Red Sea the children of Israel must have felt the enormity of a burden that overwhelmed their souls.  Three things would reinforce this: 1) The Egyptian army was bearing down on them, 2) They were incapable of overcoming the waters in front of them, 3) God was the one who had guided them there.  What hope would remain in their God if He was the one guiding them to that place where the reality of death would terrorize their hearts?  And this was their story.

Indeed, they should have every reason to be overwhelmed if they didn't know any better.  But they did know better, or at least they should have known better.  God told Moses just why He led them to the Red Sea: "I will harden Pharaoh's heart...and I will get glory over Pharaoh and all his host and the Egyptians shall know that I am the LORD" (Ex. 14:4).  And so they watched, probably most of them, in disbelief as the waters parted and as they walked.  And they watched, as the Egyptians came, and then the waters came crashing back together to destroy their enemy. 

And too in this season, I wait...we wait.  God led us here to this place.  There is no yellow-brick road in front of me.  There is no way of ease and comfort in front of me, but God is leading amidst all of this.  He has brought us to this place where our reality appears impossibility, but instead of putting our heads down in defeat we rejoice that impossibility is that place to where God has guided those before us only to show it as a greater opportunity to glorify Himself even in our joy. And we believe that God will plant a church even through all of this and involve us in it.  And so our story, this story, is every bit another chapter in a greater story, GOD's story that will prove the love, power, and glory of God to do things so great whereby we too will say continually, "Come and see what GOD has done."

Confessions of a Church Planter

Closed doors...we see them everywhere.  We think little of the closed doors that we can physically walk toward and push open in order to get through.  Somehow the ability for us to persevere toward and through such an obstacle is nothing for us because we have done it before.  Of course sometimes a door is locked.  That usually requires on our part then a little more effort.  Maybe it is resolved by reaching into our pocket and pulling out the necessary key.  Maybe it is resolved by walking around to the other side of the building or the next nearest door that is open.  In any case, very often this is our reality, but we find the steadfastness within us to overcome the problem.  And then there are other times when we approach a door to our favorite store that isn't opened.  The solution to that is rather than walk away and say, "Well I guess it wasn't supposed to be" we instead look at our clock and realize it is locked because we are there too early and in the next 5 minutes that store will be open. The simple fact is this: often times we encounter a closed door, and that doesn't cause us to conclude we aren't to get into the area on the other side.  

When did so many of us as Christians concede to the closed door as God's will that we  discontinue our efforts?  When did our theology become such a faithless, conceding, downtrodden practice?  Now make no mistake, I believe fully that God absolutely closes doors that aren't to be opened (Acts 16:7), but increasingly my conviction grows from Scripture that not only are closed doors are aimed not to cause us to quit, but rather to continue.  Too closed doors are the plan and purpose of God.  Now let me qualify this.  By closed doors I am speaking of opposition and difficulty involved in a situation in which one believes they are being called by God. 

Consider: Peter and John.  We come to a day when they healed a man outside the entrance to the temple square (Acts 4).  This caused a great number to follow the Jesus they proclaimed, and it caused a great disturbance to grow among the Sanhedrin.  Ultimately they were firmly rebuked and threatened if they continued to proclaim Jesus.  If ever there was reason to stop, that would be sufficient reason.  But they are doing the will of God, so why should it be difficult?  Was God's blessing not on them?  Was His favor removed?  Were they somehow in sin that this great oppression would fall on them?  None of the above!  

As they were released they reflected and concluded something profound.  Christ, the one who walked in perfect obedience to the will of the Father, faced oppression, threats, and an ultimately violent death at the hands of wicked and sinful men.  But why God?  Where are you God?  The disturbing part of this story (humanly speaking) is that God, the Father of Jesus, orchestrated the entire thing (Acts 4:24-28).  And so their prayer about the oppression they faced was not a confession of conceding because it must not be God's will.  No, but rather it was a deeper, firmer, more steadfast commitment to continue because this was every bit God's will and design.  And so they asked for more boldness to speak what they were warned not to speak.  

And so oppression, threats, doubts of others, of my own - all great reasons to quit the efforts to see God use us to make CHRIST known, even as HE plants a church with us as servants, right?.  NEVER!  Opposition should cause us instead to consider that this is only further evidence of HIS calling, HIS affirmation.  And in all this HE deepens our dependence upon HIM.  And HE makes us more like Christ.  So rejoice!  God is at work, even as He closes doors, disturbs situations around us.